Apologies to a Brother
by QuickestSecret
Summary: Roman remembers a tragic day. Sanders Sides.


**Yay, I'm not dead!**

**Yeah, this is a songfic. I recently discovered the song "Lullaby For A Princess" by Ponyphonic and animation by WarpOut. Despite not being an MLP fan, this song touched me, and also made me think of the Sanders twins. So I took some of the lyrics and changed them to fit the story better. I'm including a link to the original video and a link to the instrumental in case you want to try to sing my lyrics.**

**Original video: watch?v=UsKSOq9_X0w**

**Instrumental version: watch?v=sNpkY07G4iA&t=19s**

**With all that been said, Sanders Sides, MLP, "Lullaby For A Princess" and "Morning Mood" do not belong to me.**

**As always, please enjoy and review!**

* * *

Roman lay on his bed, idly staring up at the ceiling. It was a down day for Thomas, so the sides were taking the free time to relax and unwind. Logan was undoubtedly reading some new text book, Virgil was probably on Tumblr, and Roman knew Patton was baking down in the mind palace kitchen. The tantalizing scent of brownies wafted through the air vents, and Roman smiled to himself. They would certainly have a treat after dinner tonight.

Calming classical music played quietly from Roman's IPod across the room on his desk. Despite being a wild Disney fan, every now and again, the princely side enjoyed not feeling the pull to sing along to every song that played, leaving him to instead ride the symphony and travel the ups and downs of it's invisible story.

'Morning Mood' faded out, and the brief silence swept over Roman. He sighed. He was actually glad Thomas had the day off, because Roman wasn't sure he would've been able to function properly. June 18th always did this to him, despite having been ages ago.

If the date on it's own wasn't enough, shuffle decided to resurrect an old song, one Roman had almost forgotten. Violins and piano rose elegantly, and with them, memories. Memories of things said and done.

Things _he_ had said and done.

Roman sat up and sighed again. It was bound to happen, it always did this time of year. Reaching under the bed, he pulled out a worn book, pages old and cover leathery from touch and use. He opened to the first page and gazed at the taped in photograph, the familiar tug at his heart now starting in earnest. Barely thinking about it, he began to sing.

_"__Fate has been cruel and order unkind,_

_How can I have sent you away?_

_The blame was my own; the punishment yours,_

_The palace is silent today."_

A young Creativity, Morality, and Logic beamed back at the prince, but Roman's eyes were drawn to the tiny figure behind them, a small splotch of green in the sea of blues and red being the only hint he was there at all.

_"__But into the stillness, I'll bring you a song,_

_And I'll dig through the past treasuries_

_Till your tired mind and my aching heart_

_Have had enough of the memories."_

Roman turned the pages slowly, one by one. Every one of them had several pictures either taped or glued to them.

Patton learning his way around the kitchen and proudly presenting his first edible batch of cookies.

Logan during Christmas, joy in his grin as he unwrapped the first of the Harry Potter series.

Roman trying karaoke for the first time and owning Mulan's "I'll Make a Man Out of You".

Occasionally, the camera caught the child in green, but when he was there, he was on the outskirts of the little family. In the rare pictures when he was in full view, Roman seemed to be the only one who could see him.

The delicate sound of a mandolin echoed throughout Roman's room, and he continued to sing, lump in his throat be damned.

_"__Once did a small prince who shone like the sun_

_Look out on his friends with pride_

_He smiled and said "Surely there is nobody_

_So lucky and so very blessed as I."_

Roman swallowed, eyes tracking the growth of he and the other Light Sides. Glasses appeared on both Logan and Patton, and each gained a necktie and cardigan, respectively. A bright red sash eventually marked himself as the fanciful aspect of Thomas. But the child in green simply became darker as time passed.

_"__So bright was his flame and so cheerful his smile,_

_That long was the shadow he cast,_

_Which fell dark upon the twin brother he loved,_

_And grew only darker as days and nights passed."_

Eventually, the child, now in green _and_ black, disappeared from the photo album. Roman closed the book, recognizing this as the time when Patton really began his work, helping Thomas differentiate between right and wrong.

Roman's mind took over, filtering reality with painful recollection as he stared around his room, never stopping his musical storytelling. He watched as his younger self and brother materialized, arguing.

_"__Soon did that small prince take notice that the others_

_Did not give his brother the same care_

_And their host had realized he wasn't all good_

_So he watched as his brother lay his discontent bare."_

_"__They don't like me, Roman!" Remus shouted. "They never have!"_

_"__You just have to give them a chance, Remus," Roman pleaded. "I know that they—"_

_"__But it's not just them! Thanks to Patton, Thomas is figuring out that _you're_ the better one out of both of us! Sooner or later, he's going to stop listening to me completely." Remus' voice cracked and his shoulders slumped, the fight going out of him. "It was always going to happen. I don't know why you thought you could stop it."_

_"__Remus, I'm sorry, I really am, but—"_

_"__But what do you care?!" Remus snarled, ferocity returning just as quick as it had left. "You're the golden one! The perfect prince! The cherished "fanciful" side!" Remus grinned, full of malice as he brushed past his twin roughly. "Why not give the people what they think they deserve?"_

_And he left their room, slamming the door so hard the walls shook and Roman winced._

Roman saw his child self, shaking in surprise. Then his expression changed from fear to anger, and he growled, clenching his fists. Roman shook his head at the memory, disgusted at his own actions. The music swelled, and his voice strengthened to match it.

_"__But such is the way of the Light Side, it sweetly_

_Enchanted the mind of its host_

_And that foolish prince just did nothing to stop_

_The destruction of one who had needed him most."_

The prince blinked and teleported himself to The Pit. The place where it had all ended, just as quickly as it had begun.

The Pit was believed to be the entrance to the home of the Dark Sides. Shadowy, cold and fraught with terrors and beasts, it was designed to keep the evils locked away where they could do little harm. Roman had first hated Virgil when he came out of The Pit, because he saw the anxious side as proof that one could survive and escape. Fortunately, he had soon come around and made peace with him. The Light Sides typically stayed a good distance away from the innocent looking hole, knowing the horrors it possessed.

But the twins hadn't, on that terrible day.

The IPod and accompanying melody had been left back in Roman's room, but he didn't care. He had the coming lyrics committed to memory after having written and rewritten the words he so badly wanted his brother to hear.

Little Roman and Remus appeared again, swords and shields in hand. Roman watched them, eyes welling as he sang, straining to reach the pair, to stop them..

_"__Goodbye now, dear twin, I'm sorry, brother mine_

_Rest now with darkness embrace."_

_"__Remus, stop!" Roman cried, blocking another attack from his brother and pushing him off. "This isn't you!"_

_"__Oh, but it is, my dear Roman," Remus said sleekly, the new white streak in his hair flapping about as he landed a short distance away. "You see, I've learned that not all types of creativity are appreciated." He hefted his blade and rushed Roman, who barely had time to lift his shield and defend himself._

_"__Deliver my apologies, bring them to his ears_

_Through shadow, and through veil, and through pain."_

_"__So I thought to myself," Remus said calmly, spinning for a counter attack, "why be forgotten if I can be the only creative side left?!" Sparks flew as swords clashed._

The knot in Roman's gut twisted as he witnessed the two young boys unknowingly step closer and closer to The Pit.

_"__Carry the peace and the coolness of night_

_And carry my tears in kind."_

_"__Please, you can't!"_

Roman took a shaky breath as his younger self started to cry, beaten down by his brother. A tear rolled down his own cheek as well. Still, he watched, and he sang.

_"__Remus, you are loved so much more than you know_

_May troubles be far from your mind."_

_"__I can and I will." Remus stalked toward Roman, a manic glint in his eyes. "And all it takes is one—little—PUSH!" He lunged at Roman, who swiftly stepped aside out of self-preservation._

Roman broke into a dead sprint, reason gone, and head filled with alarms and the ever-growing chant of _catch him, catch him, CATCH HIM!_

But, of course, he couldn't catch him.

_Remus wobbled, smirk vanished from his lips. Roman reached to grab the back of his lime-green sash, realizing the danger._

_He missed._

Roman stopped at the edge of The Pit, even with his younger self, both watching as their brother fell. His cheeks were wet, and breath hitched in his throat. As his child incarnation screamed, Roman lowered his voice and whispered the final lyric, bowing his head as the shadows swallowed his twin whole.

_"__Please forgive me for being so blind."_

_"__REMUS!"_

****~ONE WEEK LATER~****

"Well if there's one thing I know, it's that Reese Witherspoon isn't _e_v_i_l." Patton nearly choked as he looked over at Roman. Roman gave him an odd look, but said nothing. _Probably just the cookie he ate before doing the video._

Virgil scoffed from his place on the stairs. "I resent that. Ghosts aren't evil. They just scare people because you never know when they're going to _SHOW UP_!" His voice went deeper as he, too, glanced at the prince, eyes wide. Thomas also seemed to be somewhat panicked.

"Okay, okay, I take back what I said about ghosts!" Roman said, thinking they were just bashing his take on the movie.

A sharp pain exploded in the back of his head, and all went green and black.


End file.
